How I was diagnosed with ADHD
Memes. So. Many. Memes.
My big brother kept posting them and I kept thinking that surely everyone thought like that, or did that thing, or was weird in that way.
Nah sis. It’s just you. And million upon millions of fellow ADHD’ers.
I said nothing though. Surely that’s normal? Surely I am being persuaded by the power of suggestion? Confirmation bias gone wild? Ignore. Don’t look. Keep going to the psych to try to work out why you can’t get your act together.
Soon after, someone who I trust deeply and who has known me since I was 15, looked at me and said “Have you considered you have ADHD”. I am pretty sure I made the shocked pikachu face at her before replying “Well. Funny you should ask that…”
Aaaaand then, what I would later come to know is called hyperfixation kicked in, and it was ALL I could think about. I watched so much youtube, followed Facebook and insta people, googled all the things. I acquired so much knowledge in that time.
The reason why so many things in my life are the way they are finally made so much sense. I could do something with this! I could move my life forward and one day stop feeling like I was a constant mental health crisis. That I was consistently too lazy or overwhelmed to see anything though.
Then the fight with The Man (the patriarchal medical establishment here in Australia) began. Initially with my psychologist, who I’d been seeing for a year or so. I told her that I had been considering that I have ADHD, and she looked at me and said
I don’t think so. I think you just haven’t tried hard enough to apply yourself in your life.
– Anon psychologist
I was speechless. I held in my anger and my distress and the second I was out the door, I cried and cried. I had been told that exact sentence over and over since primary school. That I was lazy, that I was too busy doing what I enjoyed to pay attention, that I was intelligent but refused to use it, that if only I would knuckle down I could achieve something worthwhile. The weight of over 30 years of that shame held me in chains.
With support from close friends and online neurodivergent spaces, I had my wallow, and then I picked myself up and kept going. I went on waitlists for ADHD specialists and psychiatrists. I kept my learning focus and I began to discuss it in public. Finally, over a year later, ya girl ticked 16 out of 18 criteria in the DSM5, and 6 months after that was taking home my brand new meds.
Ok, so the last bit is a simplification! But I have a sneaking suspicion this is already too long, so, for my very first one ever, that’s a wrap! Thank you for reading this. Thank you so very much for being here.
With love, Sarah
ADHD Thrive 